Blogging is bad for the waistline! There… the truth is out!
I don’t like it, but I can’t stop writing. So… what’s the answer?
There’s always ‘shapewear’.
They’ve tried to make a girdle sexy. Sorry… not working! It is still a girdle. In the hot summer, when you can barely pull a t-shirt on without it sticking to sweaty skin, you don’t stand a prayer of pulling up or down a shapewear product! And in the winter, at least in the Northeast, you could freeze your boobs off before you get the thing on.
You have to love the before and after photos, though. Most of them look the same, which means they didn’t need a girdle in the first place. False advertising! It’s not worth it.
Most people are taller than me, which has been a problem for years now, being too short for my weight, but there just isn’t enough difference to fight with the spandex.
You have to do it prior to putting your make-up on because you’ll sweat so much during the process (even in winter) that you’ll have to start all over.
In addition to that, there’s the problem of breathing afterward, let alone eating! Most of the time you’ll go through this process for a big night out.
Usually a big night out involves dinner. Forget about it! You’re going to feel like dinner… if they’re serving sausage. And you won’t want to drink anything because that would lead to a trip to the ladies room… let’s not even talk about that.
My other issue with shapewear is the fat/flab you’re squeezing into it doesn’t magically disappear. It shifts someplace else. So unless they invent a unitard… no wait… that would probably make your head explode.
Have you ever met a man who used shapewear? Puhleez! I like to think women are the brighter sex, but I think men have us on this subject. A man wouldn’t last an hour in it. But, at least they would have a fly, which makes the bathroom issue moot.
Have you had the pleasure of shapewear? Please tell me how much you love/hate it.
It is a testament to my marriage when I tell you I’ve had to ask my husband to pull the thing off of me. Bless his heart, he did it without laughing his ass off!