Selling your home and moving is reportedly one of the top 10 stressors in our lifetime. And while I agree that it’s disruptive and often frustrating (“What do you mean you packed all the kitchen utensils?? We’re not moving for 10 more days.” Oops), on a more positive note, it’s a great time to clean up and clean out the years of accumulated, unnecessary crap that has expanded to fill every nook and cranny in the house. My motto is: If we’re not using it, we’re not moving it. Since most junk ultimately ends up in the garage over the years, leaving little room to park an actual car, our packing and purging has resulted in enough space for my little car to snuggle in and stay and warm on these cold, winter nights. Happy car, happy wife.
Of course, what goes in, must come out. Now that my car is in the garage, it has to be backed out every morning. Years of attempts to learn this particular driving skill continue to have the same failed results. Kenny is always instructing me to “just GO STRAIGHT BACK,” but somehow my car (okay, me) always shanks left.
This morning Kenny left for work (or so I thought), and as I was “just going straight back,” I shanked and drove over the yard, leaving 2 horrifyingly clear tire tracks in the frost-covered grass. All hopes that the evidence would melt away in the afternoon sun were lost when I noticed Kenny’s truck still at the end of the driveway and I glimpsed his look of incredulity between repeated smacking of his head on his steering wheel. Awesome.
But later that day…
I drove back home and noticed the “We’re moving so we’re tossing everything” dumpster at the end of the driveway for garbage pickup. Kenny asked (speaking slooowly and more than a little condescendingly) if I could somehow manage to GO AROUND it and TRY to avoid the grass, since the new owners kind of like it still intact. Then he hops in his truck, throws it in reverse and floors it, confident in his manly-man driving skills, promptly plowing into the dumpster, sending metal flying and leaving rather impressive skid marks right smack in the center of our driveway. Thank you, God. Thank you, thank you, thank you! I’m HOWLING with laughter, as I watch through the living room window while he ever-so-nonchalantly retrieved the dumpster from the road and quickly scrambled back into his truck to drive off like nothing happened.
I so wish life had an instant replay button. We’d watch this again, and again, and…
Oh, Vikki…I am SO WITH YOU!
Great post, and do give the poor dumpster my condolences.
Karen
Crying with laughter!! This is just AWESOME in every way!!!
Perfect! I share your challenges with backing up… ;) What a satisfying moment!
That is so when I wish I would have had it on film to watch it over and over, so that I could laugh over and over, lol!! Men always seem to know it all so a moment like that is priceless in my book!!
I haven’t parked in my garage in the 22 years we’ve lived in our house. I admire your ability to pull in, even if backing out is challenging.
Ahahahaha! I love witnessing those moments.
And THAT’s why my car stays parked in the driveway year-round.!
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha! That’s awesome. (If your the spouse and reading this comment what I meant by the previous is that I’m so sorry that happened and I hope your truck is okay.)
Justice is served!!!!
Oh! How the mighty have fallen!
Ahahah! Great post. I hate moving. That’s why I don’t do it. :P
oh, the times when you wish you had a video camera so you could play that clip over and over!!! Love it!
Best of luck with the move!
Haha! Serves him right! Karma, karma, karma. I’m so glad you saw it, for this could have happened without your as witness, and what a travesty that would have been.
LOL! Was this in the past and have you moved yet?
Oh how the mighty has falling. LOL. Sorry I can’t tell U how to back up. But can do it.
But a word of wisdom an packing an moving
1 pack what U r not using now
2 mark every box for each room
Then hope they get to the right rooms when they get there.
My last move was a night mare even with boxes maked. Nothing ended up in the right room. I was a sea of boxes an funiture for a good 6 week. With no help to move then. I know where my silverware was my coffee pot. But where where the dishes. I went out bought 2 plates to eat off. After finely getting the big stuff in the right rooms an somewhat in order. I found the dish in the 4th bedroom more then 2 months later. Sad to say being disabled. An no help it took me forever. To find everything. I faild a inpection. Due to not being unpacked. Well now I still have pack boxes but no more inspection for a while. Word to the wise it easyer if they are in the right place so not to carry then all over the house. Good luck with the move. As for backing up. Ur on Ur own. As for Kenny payback a well U know LOL
Oh My Goodness that is Priceless! Don’t you wish you had a video running? You lucky woman!! I love it!
Holly
Reminds me of the time my former volunteer fireman husband thought the burn pile was out and was surprised by half dozen fire trucks barreling down our driveway to put out the grass fire he started along the airport landing strip. He had to buy the whole crew beer!
Thanks for the laughs! I needed it today! I’ve backed into my husband’s car more than once.
Loved it! We’re moving also, so I can totally relate,
Your stories are why I wear panty liners. I’m hysterical!!!!
Hahahahahaha!!!! That is all.
I love when this shit happens! Poetic justice.
A garage is really for a car? Who knew?
You have renewed my faith in Sweet Justice.
Now that’s karma…or maybe car-ma!!!
Hahaha. Moving sucks, but this makes it a little more tolerable… ;)
Ha! One of those perfect moments…
Too funny! I am 60 and still have a problem parallel parking. Yup. I do it. But I don’t always do it right the first or second try. Garages are tricky business. You have my understanding and sympathy. And, I’m laughing WITH you.
So, there IS a god! And justice for all.
Amen.
THAT. was flippin’ hilarious!!!! Absolutely priceless!!! years ago…as in the early 80’s, a friend of mine parked her car in our driveway. My mother pulled out of the garage and slammed right into the car. Then she had the audacity to yell at my friend for causing the accident. I’m sorry, what? You don’t look behind you and this makes it my friend’s fault how? And yes. In your care a repeat complete with a YouTube video would have been absolutely awesome!
I should add…I am glad that, apart from his ego, he wasn’t injured.
Oh I can SOOOO relate to this! Can’t back up to save my life! My hubby is constantly telling me to just use my mirrors and keep the wheels straight. Well yeah! That would work great if I could be looking in both mirrors at the same time! Glad you got to see & enjoy the blunder made by your back-upper advisor! Priceless! Thanks for sharing!